Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(503): View more from Oregon

when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?

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(503): when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship? http://tfl.nu/e3yh

Replies (15) Good night (2281) Bad night (677)
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(954): View more from Florida

I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.

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(954): I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs. http://tfl.nu/kpvs

Replies (37) Good night (1795) Bad night (3626)
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(219): View more from Indiana

I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.

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(219): I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious. http://tfl.nu/0lgt

Replies (17) Good night (3965) Bad night (749)
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(250): View more from British Columbia

He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."

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(250): He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that." http://tfl.nu/vmd9

Replies (37) Good night (1386) Bad night (5465)
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(914): View more from New York

i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.

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(914): i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar. http://tfl.nu/zfa3

Replies (12) Good night (4658) Bad night (746)
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(919): View more from North Carolina

the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.

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(919): the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's. http://tfl.nu/kqcw

Replies (10) Good night (4158) Bad night (878)
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(913): View more from Kansas

The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.

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(913): The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off. http://tfl.nu/h8iv

Replies (20) Good night (2479) Bad night (1488)
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(603): View more from New Hampshire

She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.

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(603): She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying. http://tfl.nu/6631

Replies (6) Good night (845) Bad night (3657)
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(919): View more from North Carolina

Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.

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(919): Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music. http://tfl.nu/oyb0

Replies (24) Good night (7887) Bad night (964)
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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.

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(724): Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores. http://tfl.nu/hule

Replies (5) Good night (523) Bad night (1261)
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(630): View more from Illinois

Thank you for not boning my boss.

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(630): Thank you for not boning my boss. http://tfl.nu/8tof

Replies (1) Good night (1035) Bad night (486)
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(516): View more from New York

sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day

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(516): sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day http://tfl.nu/3ryn

Replies (3) Good night (516) Bad night (805)
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(937): View more from Ohio

I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...

(1-937): View more from Ohio

I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.

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(937): I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke... (1-937): I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment. http://tfl.nu/31kk

Replies (3) Good night (306) Bad night (503)
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(251): View more from Alabama

My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.

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(251): My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult. http://tfl.nu/4jpl

Replies (0) Good night (604) Bad night (199)
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(701): View more from North Dakota

he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party

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(701): he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party http://tfl.nu/b7mb

Replies (0) Good night (568) Bad night (229)

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