Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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