Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
