ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize
