OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
I am in a vortex of obligation.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
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