That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
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