p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
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puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
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being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize