i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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