your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize