i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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