When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
