is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
