there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
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