THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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