Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
