I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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