i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
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