He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
I party with great urgency now.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
