Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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