Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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