Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Damn victory sex feels great
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Randomize
