My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
