I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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