Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize