windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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