Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(206): View more from Washington

I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.

(1-206): View more from Washington

Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.

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(419): View more from Ohio

His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.

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(615): View more from Tennessee

He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."

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(609): View more from New Jersey

This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage

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25 People Admit the Worst Things They’ve Done for Good Reasons
Read it at the TFLN blog
(217): View more from Illinois

she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.

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(407): View more from Florida

you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.

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(956): View more from Texas

Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.

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