I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize
