Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Everything about him screamed your future.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
