My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
