maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
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