I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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