So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Randomize