even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
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