I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
You've changed since you got that strap on
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Randomize
