only you would photoshop your dick
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
