Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Randomize
