you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
