So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Randomize
