In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
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