Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
