whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize