I will die if light touches me.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize