there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
