haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
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Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
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If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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