Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Randomize
