No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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