he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I just want nice things and good sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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