I look better un-naked...
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Is it penis luge time yet?
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
