Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
vagina is talking i cant
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Randomize
