Im at strip club and am horny
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize