it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
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