I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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